Monday, August 16, 2010

advice on relationships

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Saturday, August 14, 2010

Tips On How To Get Your Ex Girl Back

Be Yourself:

The first good tip that you should follow on how to get your ex girl back is to simply be yourself. If you really want to have a shot at getting your ex back, you need to become the person that the ex was attracted to in the first place. Too many people in this situation would be tempted to act macho or clingy, both of which are terrible things to do to an ex that has already expressed her desire to have space from you. You need to act like your own honest self around your ex and make her see the great person that you are. Only when she truly realizes how much she misses having you around will you have a chance at getting her back.

Less Contact is Better:

Another good tip for you to follow is that less contact with your ex is better. This is actually another one of those tips that is counterintuitive for some people. A lot of people would be tempted to try and get into as many situations with their ex as possible in order to have the maximum exposure to them. This is something that is likely to push them out of your life for good. Your ex broke up with you and that means that they voluntarily decided that they wanted space from you. Give them that space and respect their privacy. Be nice and yourself to them when you do get a chance to see them and maybe they’ll start to pick up the things that made them want you in the first place.

Move On Slowly:

Another thing that you can do is to move on slowly. This is not something that’ll help you like the other tips on how to get your ex girl back. What it’ll do for you however is start to put your mind back into healthy mode. Obsessing after an ex is generally not a good idea, especially if the ex is the one that ended the relationship. Most of the time, they’re not coming back to you. If you move on slowly and start to realize that there are other fish in the sea, you will be much healthier mentally. That’ll translate into much more positive body language which in turn will be noticed by your ex the few times that you see them.

Don’t Blow Opportunities:

The thing about attempts to get your ex back is that you can undo weeks or even months of decent work with one stupid line uttered in the heat of the moment. If you do the things discussed above, your ex might start to take an interest in you again. If she does, make sure that you keep on doing those things. Be yourself, be honest and above all else do not pester them. If you suddenly start to become needy and false, your ex will spot the change a mile away and you will destroy all the progress you’ve made.

Friday, August 13, 2010

Relationship Rescue

Many people begin searching for relationship rescue tactics to try and bring back the spark they once had with a partner when the magic begins to fade. Over time, most relationships grow and change from the loving, romantic bond into a steady routine of daily rituals and habits. In some cases, those habits can make one or both people in the relationship feel as though they're being taken for granted.

Some people may find that they're arguing more often than they're enjoying each other. Others may find that there's nothing left to say to each other or they simply fall into a daily pattern where everything else seems more important than the relationship.

Your relationship doesn't have to be this way.

Often the first avenue many people try in order to re-kindle a relationship is to try and bring back some of the romance. Intimate dinners and provocative lingerie are nice physical attempts at bringing you closer again, but they don't address on the inner, emotional reasons why the relationship may be strained. On the other hand, endlessly talking about your relationship rescue plans and tactics could potentially drive a wedge between you and strain the relationship even further.

There are plenty of relationship rescue tactics you can use to bring that loving spark back into your relationships. Here are some relationship rescue suggestions you can try to help get you back on the right track.

1. Appreciation

When the initial heady, romantic stage of any relationship begins to settle into a comfortable partnership, many people lose sight of the things they originally appreciated in their partner. They begin to focus on the things that irritate them or annoy them or make them mad.

Unfortunately, focusing on all the negative aspects of your partner can often bring about a feeling of resentment, which can lead to arguments and eventually the destruction of the relationship.

It's important to try and find things in your partner that you appreciate. You might appreciate their kindness or their sense of humor or their intelligence or whatever attribute attracted you to them in the first place.

2. Awareness

Live each day of your relationship as though it was the last day you have with your partner. Accidents happen when we least expect them. While this doesn't mean it's going to happen to you, consider how you'd feel if something did happen and today really was the final day you had together.

What would you regret most? What would you wish you'd said or done or changed if you never had the opportunity to do them again?

Your answers to those questions should be the very same things you need to be doing with your partner each and every day. When you live each day as though it was your last, the romance will return almost immediately.

3. Communication

Your partner can't read your mind. Sitting in silence letting a problem brew until you're at bursting point won't make your partner see problems any more clearly and it can compound the negative emotions within you.

It's important to communicate with your partner about your expectations, your needs, your goals and ambitions, your disappointment and anger. Communication is about letting the other person know what you're feeling in a clear, non-blaming manner so that you can both be sure you're on the same page.

Relationship rescue is all about finding ways to be sure you understand and appreciate the little things you do for each other instead of focusing on the negatives. If you can communicate clearly and find ways to appreciate and support your partner, then your relationship rescue attempts will be rewarded.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Tips On How Can I Tell If My Boyfriend Really Loves Me

If you have the question of "how can I tell if my boyfriend really loves me" in your mind, there is no doubt you have a tinge of apprehension and uncertainty about his love. Trust me when I tell you; you're not alone with your doubts. Many girls have similar doubts, because the signals they are getting from their boyfriends, just aren't strong enough to really answer the all important question; "Does he really love me?"

I also want you to realize that it may well not be your fault that these doubts enter into your mind. Simply because your significant other may belong, to that 'herd', of men who have extreme difficulty in showing affection. Even when they are deeply in love, it is almost impossible for them to convey it openly or even overtly to you.

When you are with him, you may have a feeling that everything is all right. But once you are out of his sight, it looks as if he has completely forgotten your existence. But once these "doubts" enter into your thoughts, they can quickly become an obsession and consume you. And the end result can destroy your relationship; with someone who does love you. Therefore it's important for you to learn the skills of reading and interpreting your lovers signs; of his true love for you. The following are a few tips that will enable you to help you to resolve the doubts you have been experiencing

- When you are having a conversation with him, you should maintain eye contact. If he is serious about you and the conversation, he will also look directly into your eyes. You will quickly learn he's not being distracted by the other things going on around you both and it's a sure sign of his true feelings for you.

- If your beau puts your priorities before his, you can pretty well conclude that you are special to him and he cares deeply for you.

- Another sign you can look for if he is willing to discuss his 'personal life' openly with you or even obliquely. This shows that he holds you in very high esteem and he believes you will give your moral support and advice on solving the issues. Yes, he will have his own ideas to sort these issues out, he will respect your thoughts and perhaps implement your suggestions. And when a man does that you can bet, your are more than just a girlfriend.

- As you may know, a great many men have trouble remembering those "special days." A sure sign of true feeling for you is when he will try hard to remember those special days such as your birthday, the anniversary of your first meeting with him, etc. and present you with gifts that are unique. These gifts may be inexpensive but they will speak volumes of his love towards you.

If you observe that the behavior of your boy friend conforms to the above clues, you can conclude that he really loves you, though he is not the type who expresses it openly. These signs provide an answer to your question, "how can I tell if my boyfriend really loves me?".

Sunday, August 8, 2010

Long Distance Relationship Advice

Maintaining a healthy long distance relationship can be a challenge. It takes two mature people who are able to communicate in order to make it work. It will also take some sound long distance relationship advice, and that's where I come in.

In this article I've outlined some of the things that you can do to make your relationship not only survive, but thrive. I've also compiled a few of the most common problems couples face and how to avoid falling into the same traps in your relationship.

One of the first things you and your partner need to do to ensure the continued strength of your relationship is to make sure you are both on the same page. Make sure you agree on whether or not you have an exclusive relationship. If one partner thinks it's ok to date while you are apart and the other one is staying monogamous, the relationship is doomed from the start.

For the most part, a couple won't even contemplate a monogamous long distance relationship unless both parties feel the relationship has the potential to be a long term one. There is no sense making this type of commitment unless you both feel that the other person might be 'the one'.

Another thing you and your partner need to do is make sure you have good communication skills. When you are far away from each other for extended periods of time, and you can't have physical contact, you will have to rely solely on your communication skills to continue to build your relationship.

That is why long distance relationships, when they last, are some of the best relationships around. The couple has to learn to communicate effectively to make it work, and they don't get distracted by all the physical attraction. They are able to connect on a deeper level which can often lead to a more fulfilling relationship.

If you are an insecure person, though most people won't admit it if they are, you should avoid getting involved in a long distance relationship. Being in this type of relationship requires a great amount of trust, typically people who are insecure see a threat everywhere, even where there isn't one.

If you and your partner are overly suspicious, not only will your relationship be a constant battle, it will also be unlikely to work. No good relationship can be based on suspicion and insecurities.

You and your partner also need to be careful of the temptation to have a 'fling' with someone while away from your partner. Unless you both agree in advance that some extracurricular activity is ok (and if that's the case why bother pursuing a long distance relationship in the first place) than you should stay faithful to your partner.

If you want to maintain your long distance relationship you have to know ahead of time that it will be a challenge and you and your partner both have to be committed to making it work, but if you follow my long distance relationship advice you and your partner have a real shot of having a great, long term loving relationship.

Saturday, August 7, 2010

Relationships - Break Up To Make Up

This is your guide: Relationships – Break Up to Make Up. The break up may be just the first stage in getting back together with an ex.

If you had been dating for any length of time, you and your ex had a lot invested in the relationship. You obviously loved and cared for each other. But something went wrong and one of you decided to call it quits. How you handle the relationship break up may have a lot to do with whether you can ever make up.

If you are the one initiating the break up, try to do it with love and compassion. Whether you are truly calling it quits or just wanting a time out, remember that this is a person who has been important to you and you have a responsibility to take his or her feelings into account.

It’s generally best to tell the person that you want to break up in a public place. That’s because people are less likely to embarrass themselves if others are around. Also, don’t draw the break up out. Just say your piece and leave.

Once you have broken up, leave the channels of communication open. Be there for your ex when he or she needs you.

Don’t play games with your ex. Some people suggest dating their best friend or flaunting a new date on your ex, but consider that if you ever make up, these things are going to haunt your new relationship.

If you have found that you want to get back together with your ex, consider the following:

· Tell them that you are interested · Be interesting yourself – take up new activities and make new friends · Try a new look – whether it is a new hair style or simply updating your grooming, your ex will notice.

Suggest that you meet your ex for lunch or some other non-romantic activity. During this time, you can bring up the positive memories you shared. You can also emphasize any changes you have made in your life.

If your ex gives you any indication that he or she is willing to give it a second try, don’t assume that you can start right back where you left off. Woo your boyfriend or girlfriend. Go out on romantic dates. Start by holding hands, not jumping into the sack.

Also, give your relationship time to heal from the break up. Don’t assume that your ex’s feelings weren’t hurt by the cooling off period.

Continue improving yourself. Don’t fall into bad habits just because you’ve got your ex back. Constantly strive to be the best boyfriend or girlfriend you can be.

That’s your guide to Relationships – Break up to Make up.

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Should You Try Getting Over A Relationship Or Put Your Energy Into Getting Your Ex Back

When we split from a lover, we can either try getting over a relationship or try getting them back. It obviously depends on whether you still love your ex as to which one you chose.

If you do want your ex back, you need to make every attempt to achieve this. You and only you know whether he or she makes you happy and would make your life complete. Your family and friends may try to advise you but remember that they are not impartial. They love you and hopefully want what is best for you but sometimes people act with their own interests in mind.

If your friends are all single, they may have been jealous of your love affair and would prefer to keep you single. If they didn’t like your partner, they are not going to encourage you to get him/her back.

Couples, as we know, break up for all sorts of reasons. Sometimes there is no coming back from the split and you have to accept it. Often especially if it was caused by something trivial or a misunderstanding, you could salvage things if only one of you would swallow their pride and initiate contact. Usually this will have to be the man as society still thinks it is the man who should do the chasing. A woman who makes the first move can be seen as being desperate.

Examine your own feelings before you decide which option to choose. Do you want to get back with your ex, to dump them so they know how it feels? These are games for teenagers to play so if that is your motivation, do yourself a favour and move on. But if you really do believe this person to be your soul mate, you need to plan a way to get them back in your life.

Try enlisting the help of their family and friends. Now there is a fine line between asking for help and becoming a stalker so take it slowly. Just happen to be at the places these people hang out i.e. bump into them by accident and see how ms/mr ex is doing. Make sure you are looking good so that the reports back are favourable. If you haven’t slept for days, plaster on the makeup. You do not want it going back to your lover that you looked miserable and suicidal.

You could always try the direct approach and contact your former partner. Ask them out for a friendly drink or meal and see where it goes. You never know they could have been dying to make contact but were afraid that you would not entertain them. People are funny creatures –they will often let fear of the unknown hinder their future happiness.

Whatever you decide, remember that we only get one shot at life. It is not a dress rehearsal. Getting over a relationship or getting back with your ex are both achievable, the question is which one do you want to succeed at?